Fort Dicks, The Musical

Adios, The Great Race!

Take a dive, Airplane!

There’s a new cult classic in town, but you won’t find it on any silver screen.

It’s a live musical comedy that could easily push The Rocky Horror Picture Show out of the weekend midnight slot of theaters across the country, if enough people get the word out.

We’re talking about Fort Dicks, The Musical, Jeffrey Millstein’s farce about a minimum security prison, harkening back to the days of Blake Edwards, Mel Brooks or even the Marx Brothers, when life in America was a little less “PC” and yet a little more “Rated PG.”

Sean Farrelly stars as David Barnes, an accountant thrown into the clink for tax evasion, despite having to pay his lawyer—played by Carlos Cervantes—with “all the money I have in the world as well as money borrowed from all my friends and relatives… the sale of my baseball card collection and the money I saved from all the soda bottles on the back porch.”

Like all of the classic lampoons from the sixties and seventies, Fort Dicks includes “a cast of thousands:” Marek Ardito-Proulx, Paulina Breeze, Dana Cavagnaro, Mario Claudio, Sunflower Duran, Annabel Espinal, Donna Glaesener, Dominick Gonzalez, Andrew Gordon, Jason Lee, Federica Morra, Richard Sacher, Joe Sherbin, Lindsay Thomas, and Laura Young as Barnes’ beautifully-voiced girlfriend, Judy Bloomless.

Chock-full of surreal humor, physical comedy, visual and verbal puns and non-sequiturs, Fort Dicks delivers all of the cartoonish stylings and goofiness of the Zucker-Abrahams-Zucker school and the Farrelly Brothers, along with short, sophomoric songs which anyone could sing (preferably badly) on late-night stages across the country.

Fort Dicks just wrapped up production at the American Theatre of Actors, but with enough grassroots support, it could easily come back again and again and again.

If you saw the show during this run, then do Millstein and his crew a favor by telling us what you thought of this mildly dark commentary on the criminal injustice system.

Your reviews can encourage others to clamor for a Fort Dicks musical revival, and your ratings help us help you find future cult classics you’re sure to love!